Power Crunch Salad

I know most guys think once they consume quinoa they have to turn in their man card. Let alone quinoa in a salad. That is why we are calling this the POWER CRUNCH SALAD. Wooooo so masculine. It has all the worlds texture and tastes supa good- you won’t even be grumpy it’s a quinoa salad. Also, for those of you who never make shit off our blog, this salad requires no actual cooking. Just assembling. So no excuses.

Okay so there is no lettuce in this salad (it’s cool, I’ll wait here until you’ve calmed down). The base is straight up veg (aka power aka crunch on crunch on crunch).
salad pic 1
I used:

– a half a bunch of radishes sliced thin (and halved)
– a cup or two of green beans cut into one inch pieces
– a cucumber peeled, seeded, halved and sliced (they were out of english cucs- jerks)
-a yellow pepper cut into one inch bites
-4 scallions sliced (not the super green/shitty/flavorless part)
-a handful of chopped parsley
-a cup or two of cooked red quinoa that has cooled- you could use any quinoa… I believe the basic white-ish one is cheapest.. also, I cook mine in chicken stock instead of water for more flavor….To cook quinoa, put 1 cup quinoa with 1.5 cups stock (white trash option: water) and bring to boil then reduce to simmer cover and wait 15 minutes.

Once you have these partying in a bowl, squeeze two limes and a good glug of olive oil over the ingredients. I added a quarter cup or so of pumpkin seeds because I had them left over from the Granola Crusted Walnuts. Sprinkle on a generous pinch of cayenne pepper. Now add crumbled feta… I suggest as much as you feel is appropriate plus 10%.

Trust me this tastes so good. You could throw a piece of chicken or fish on top or just devour as is- yum!

salad pic 2

salad pic 3

Granola Crusted Walnuts

K so candied nuts are no joke.  Anything laden with maple syrup, butter and brown sugar is allowed in our apartment.  The issue is that we consume them in max no min 10 seconds. 

You probably think this is an issue because they are covered in all this gooey goodness.  Well it is.  But it is also an issue because the portion size for nuts is less than a handful (especially for me– my paws are huge– I mean look at my right one in this pic. It is like a claw hanging on Kelsey’s shoulder). 


This portion size doesn’t work out too well for us and in an effort to switch things up, slow our consumption down and not douse every nut in sugar we landed on Granola Crusted Walnuts. 


These taste good but do not trick yourself into thinking they will taste like the ones we used on the Brussels Sprout Salad that went with our Gnocchi recipe.  These are a “have around the apartment snack” not “give to your boyfriend snack”- they’re hardly sweetened and the primarily flavor revolves around oats and pumpkin seeds.

In OTHER VERY IMPORTANT NEWS: Kelsey has purchased a food processor for the apartment!!!! As you can imagine this has changed our lives forever so let the fun begin.


Adapted from the Smitten Kitchen:


In your FOOD PROCESSOR pulse 0.75 cups oats (not instant), 0.25 unsweetened coconut, 2 tablespoons pumpkin seeds, 0.25 teaspoons of cinnamon and a pinch of salt.  You want it to look processed but not flour-like.


In a bowl whisk 1 egg white with two teaspoons of water.  This is glue for the granola.  Put two cups of walnuts in this bowl and stir the shit out of it so every crevice has glue in it.  Add the mixture from the food processor to the bowl and stir until just combined.  Treat it like a lady but do try and get the nuts as coated as possible.  Dump onto a baking sheet and bake at 300 degrees for 20 minutes.  Healthy treat!


Pomodoro Sauce



I was pretty annoyed making this sauce.  If someone asked me if there was a sauce I was jonesin to make this would be last next to Alex Garcia’s Ham Spread.  I mean it’s just a stuck-up tomato sauce that takes longer to cook and is more acidic.  Then I tasted it and shut myself up.  Turns out it’s really really good.  Even better when served on Homemade Gnocchi like we did. 


Here is the recipe we used.  Cook the gnocchi (if using) for a hot minute in the sauce before serving.  Then the butter/cheese at the end rounds out the flavor and you’ll be pissed if you skip it, so don’t . 



White Trash Option: Keep the ignorance going as I almost did by vetoing Pomodoro in your sauce portfolio