I swear with one hand on an Ina Garten Cookbook that this bread is easy to make.

I don’t mean easy like moving cereal from the Kashi box into a bowl. I mean easy like you had to climb a medium sized mountain, but on the top there was a field of Rag and Bone Blazers. The ROI is high on this recipe.

The other day I grabbed a baguette from the bread dude in Union Market (do not get the wheat baguette from this guy, it’s a trick) and realized I’d rather eat the cardboard from the box my recent Gilt purchase came in. I wanted some homemade real-ass bread. I’ve made hardcore French baguette recipes in the past. Recipes that essentially ask you to bathe the dough as it’s cooking while simultaneously giving it a Swedish massage. It’s a lot to ask for a piece of carb.

That’s why I am so jazzed about this recipe for Rosemary and Garlic Bread.

Mix in a large bowl 5.25 cups of flour with 6 roughly chopped gloves of garlic, 4 tsp of Sea Salt and a 1/3 cup chopped rosemary.

In another bowl/measuring cup mix two cups lukewarm water (warm enough that you wouldn’t drink it but not so warm that you could have an enjoyable bath at that temp) and sprinkle 2.5 tsp dry active yeast on top. This should get kind of murky and weird looking (rem sophomore year when your parents visited and you got one of everything Wal-Mart had to offer because they were paying?…if your yeast doesn’t foam up and get weird it means you haven’t bought a fresh packet since then and it’s expired). Let the yeast chill with the water for 3 minutes and then whisk in 0.25 cups olive oil. Pour this mixture into the dry ingredients bowl and stir.

K now dump everything onto a floured surface and knead for ten minutes. This is a real workout team. It’s partially why this recipe is so great- you don’t need a stand up mixer. The only consequence is you’ll be sore and your dance moves may be limited this weekend.  Sacrifices. If you don’t know how to knead bread dough(what?!) here’s a link.

Now this dough has to hang in a large oiled bowl for 2 hours. I suggest you spend this time going to the store to get the ingredients to make other recipes from this blog.

Set dough onto a floured surface and pat down to deflate. Divide in half and roll out each dough into a rectangle.

Now roll each dough up like you are rolling a… dough into a log. Place each log onto a floured baking sheet and dust with flour. Cover with a towel and go for a one to two hour run or nap while you wait for it to double in size.

Cut 3 slashes on top of each loaf and place in a 500 degree oven on the lowest shelf. Immediately reduce to 450 and bake for 20 minutes. Then reduce to 350 and bake for another 20 minutes.

LOOK AT THESE! AND THEY TASTE AMAZING?! ARE YOU KIDDING ME?